web site of the week web site of the weekSo, here's the deal. I didn't want to tell you fools about this page, because I wanted to save all these hot men for myself. But then my lawyer was all, "Listen, honey, you aren't the only hoochie mama on campus. You gotta share the studs." You know what? She's right. I can't handle all of these men once they get on parole.
I bet you're wondering where I found my fine and fancy men. Listen up, 'cause I'm gonna give you the URL for Inmate Classifieds once: http://www.inmate.com. On the page are links to individual inmate homepages, classified ads, prison-related issues, a writer's corner, and an information page. It's all good.
Forty-two men and one woman each have homepages that are ready for your consumption, complete with pictures and life stories. The reasons why they are in jail vary considerably: robbery, drugs, gang-banging, white-collar crime, pimping, and murder.
The inmates break many criminal stereotypes. My favorite men are the teddy-bearish Dean Kennedy, the sweet Harley motorcycle man Mike Elliot, and the ex-lead singer of "The Spry Four," so if I catch you messin' with them, you're dead. The only female, Felicia, is a 19-year-old who could be facing the death penalty. Penn law students have a chance as well; some pages are lengthy case descriptions claiming their innocence.
Being incarcerated in a 9' x 5' cell isn't exactly an erotic setting. Not all of these people are looking for love; some just want friendship and support. As Inmate Classified explains, "It's sweet to be remembered, but often cheaper to be forgotten." Pick an inmate and e-mail him or her. Or at least read their stories -- whether guilty or not guilty, they are all just lonely people.
--Jennifer F. Estaris
Please E-mail StreetWeb@dp.upenn.edu
with any questions or comments.